It amazes me how simple life is yet we do nothing but complicate it.

I fell in to a pity spiral this week because I’ve been trying to manifest two things in to my life: love and a job.

I sit here trying to be okay with where I am and all my mind does is gravitate towards the things I want but don’t yet have. I brace myself for the disappointment of not getting what I want before I’ve even been proven wrong.

In my mind, if I’m prepared for the worst case scenario, it won’t hurt as bad if it happens.

Thing is, we live in a universe where we create our own reality. The more we focus on something, the more we manifest that specific thing in to our lives.

If I want someone to reach out to me and all I do is focus on the lack of them in my life, they won’t enter my life. I can say I want them around over and over, but if my mind still believes they aren’t actually here, they won’t be.

If I continue to focus on the fact that I don’t have a good job yet I continue to say I want all of these qualities out of a job, I am not on the path towards the very thing I want. I’m focused on not having it. I’m focused on my lack of money, lack of knowing how to get it, and the lack of believing that I can.

You see, as we grow up, we’re told that life is a place where we have to earn everything that comes our way. We can’t simply want something without having a damn good reason for it or working tirelessly to get it.

We’re told we can’t make a good sum of money without a degree. We’re told that if we don’t make the best use of time, at all times, we’re lazy. If we’re lazy, we aren’t cut out for a job that makes that kind of money.

So, we get down on ourselves. We force ourselves through tasks because of where it will lead us only to feel restless the entire time. We aren’t happy. But we will be, we think.

In relationships, we feel if we don’t prove to someone how much we’re worth, they won’t see a need for us. We try to help, please, and be slaves to the very people we want affection from – only to feel more alone than ever.

Our lives turn in to this cycle of ‘why me’ and ‘when will I get a break’ when in actuality our break is already here. We just have to open our minds to it.

It’s not easy feat, I get it. I spent all day yesterday laying in bed curled up with movies and my own self-pity. I felt so powerless to actually get what I want out of my life. I gave up.

 

However, we have to understand that the only thing standing between us and what we want is ourselves.

 

I mean this. For absolutely every bad situation in your life, the battle is always you vs. you.

This goes for illness, financial debt, relationships problems, stress, all of it.

I know that doesn’t feel good to hear.

I hate hearing it myself, but you can’t argue with the laws of this time-space reality.

I’m not asking you to blame yourself and fall even further in to self-pity. Truth is, none of us realize what we’re manifesting half of the time. It’s our subconscious acting out and our conscious mind  left with a puzzled face.

 

Our subconscious is the encyclopedia of every memory that took place in our lives. It remembers everything down to the very detail. You know your subconscious is being triggered when something happens to you and you feel a wave of emotion without understanding why.

 

If you were abused as a young child (so young that you hardly remember it) and your abuser wore a certain cologne, any time you smell that cologne now you may feel a sense of danger overcome you. You may feel insecure, trapped, or even powerless without any recollection of that cologne at all. Your conscious mind doesn’t actively remember the abuse and scent but the subconscious does.

On a lighter note, think about the fact that you can remember the lyrics to songs from your childhood but forget your keys all the time. The lyrics are stored in the subconscious while your conscious mind can’t be bothered about where you left the keys.

The subconscious exists because it wants to keep us safe in this world.

 

It uses its library of information to dissect issues in our lives as they come up and act accordingly. It takes what happened in the past and uses it to your advantage.

 

While this can be helpful in avoiding unnecessary pain such as knowing not to touch a hot stove, but if we were hurt by others significantly in our youth, our subconscious may put up emotional walls to prevent that same pain.

Which leads to a life where your conscious mind says ‘let’s make friends’ but your subconscious is giving you a big ‘hell no, we know what happened last time.’

 

I’ve found that the key to overcoming the subconscious mind is to first of all, notice it.

 

When you feel emotionally triggered, instead of avoiding it, try to figure out what happened – what thought occurred that made you feel bad?

In my own life, I find that I’m the queen of self-sabotage.

The moment I get my hopes up about anything, my subconscious reminds me of times where I didn’t get what I wanted. It reminds me of the nights I spent crying over disappointment and feeling like a victim to this universe.

A real buzz kill when you’re trying to cultivate anything positive in to your life.

You see, it believes it is trying to keep me safe when all it is doing is focusing more of what I don’t want to happen. By focusing on what I don’t want, I end up getting more of that. It’s a self-fulfilling prophecy that doesn’t end.

And we wonder why people can stick with jobs they hate for 20 years, why some get stuck in relationships that make them miserable, and in turn, why a lot of us use addictions to comfort the pain inside.

 

We don’t believe we have any power to change our circumstances.

 

We’re invested in trying to live our best lives only to see everything tumble-down before us. We believe we’re doing everything right so it must be the universe that is against us.

But remember what I said, there is never you vs. anyone else. It is only you vs. you.

The universe is not this force that picks and chooses who gets to have what they want. There is no deciding factor that makes someone a better candidate than someone else. The only matter involved is who is in the vibration of what they want.

 

One of the biggest tools when it comes to the law of attraction is ‘acting as if.’

 

If you want to talk to someone, even if you haven’t talked in years, if you act as if the text or phone call already occurred, it will come to you. The universe doesn’t know the difference between what actually happened and what you imagined. To the universe, it is all thought.

If you picture something you want and live out your life as if it is already here, it will arrive.

The catch is, you have to truly believe you have it. The universe reacts to energy and emotion, not words.

You can use words to increase your energy but simply repeating affirmations without any belief behind them won’t get you want you want.

 

It sounds so simple which is why we have so much resistance to this idea.

 

What happened to hard work? What happened to efforting our way through life?

Not necessary.

The reason I haven’t manifested the job or relationship I want is because I’ve been so caught up in the when and how it is going to play out.

That’s where a lot of us go wrong in manifesting.

 

Our only task is to discover what we want, believe that it is here, and let the thought go. We have to go about our lives in pure belief that we are the creators and we can have what we want.

 

The moment we try to analyze when or how we want our dreams to play out, we’re in the wrong field. The universe takes care of when and how – that’s why they call it divine timing. Everything is meant to unfold at the perfect moment and we don’t have bird’s-eye view. We don’t know what’s about to happen to us. All we know is our past and where we are now. We can’t foresee how things are going to play out because we have no idea what is in store.

When we find ourselves focused on the details of our manifestations, we have to understand that we’re doing it again – we’re focusing on the lack of having it. If it were already here, our thoughts wouldn’t go towards ‘how’ it is going to happen. It already happened. We’d focus on what we want to do now that’s it here.

Instead of thinking about how you’re going to get a job, you’d think about the shopping spree you’re going on before your first day for new work clothes.

Instead of focusing on how someone isn’t in your life that you want to be, you fall in to the space of getting excited to catch up with them. You think about what you’re going to wear and what that first hug would feel like.

 

These are thoughts you would have if what you wanted had already arrived. Trying to figure out how and when keeps you stuck in the space of ‘what I want is not yet here.’

 

Our subconscious truly isn’t trying to make things hard for us.

It’s a device created to protect us and doesn’t realize it is doing us any harm.

However, just because it doesn’t mean to cause trouble doesn’t mean we have to go on living as its slave. We have to be willing to challenge the subconscious.

When we notice our mind retracting to the same instinctive thoughts that upset us, we have to find a replacement thought.

 

Our thoughts are like habits.

 

When you want to break a habit, you find something to fill the void until you no longer feel so attached to the original habit.

 

With cigarettes, you have nicotine gum or vaping.

With cutting, some may pull a rubber band against their wrist.

 

Without any replacement, the habit can’t be overpowered.

So, let’s say that you have a subconscious belief that you don’t deserve a good job unless you work hard for it.

You find a job on a website. It seems promising and you send forth your resume, only to read the qualifications afterwards. You line up with every skill necessary except a college degree.

You immediately start your doubt your ability to get this job. Yeah, you’re excited about it, the money is good, and you see yourself there, but without a degree, you don’t feel worthy enough. It’d feel bad to get a job where you were up against someone who actually had the degree and beat them out. They worked harder than you. They deserve it more.

 

But wait, this is my subconscious.

 

It’s trying to be practical so I can make sense of why if I end up not getting it. It’s remembering all those times I was told nothing worth having comes easy. If I got the job, it would go against this belief. It would feel too simple.

 

Let’s challenge this a bit.

 

Well, a lot of people who didn’t go to college still end up with good jobs. If they still can, why wouldn’t I be able to as well?

Sometimes people who go to college end up in the same boat as me. They may have the degree, but it doesn’t equal success. So, even if I had the degree, nothing may be different. If that were true, doesn’t it feel good that at least out of the two scenarios, you’re not in debt?

I bet I could look up countless successful people who achieved what they wanted out of life without college.

Oh shit, look, Bill Gates dropped out. Oprah Winfrey only made it to her sophomore year. I’d say they’re doing pretty okay.

 

They key to overcoming the subconscious in fields you want improvement in is to find every way you can to prove it wrong. By proving it wrong, you re-program it to think differently next time.

 

From this, you’ll start to feel good and in turn, what you want will manifest. After that, not only do you have proof from others that things work out, but you created proof for yourself. You showed yourself that you are capable of having what you want in your life.

We are not victims of the world we see. We are the creators.

It is only when we realize this that our momentum can shift. It is only then that our manifestations can begin to come to light.

Do not be afraid to test the waters of your subconscious.

Because without the challenge, we would never know change.